Friday, April 2, 2010

When we last saw our snarky hero, she was ill and without a car. We missed a couple of episodes between then and now, so let's recap.

-Go Mira fixed. Took two days of working from sun rise to set, but she is in full working order. Drove home once it had started snowing (bad idea), at about 9:30 (worse idea). Hit a patch of ice on the highway, spun out, nearly hit a cop car. I spun out because I was slowing down due to the eighty bajillion flashing lights from cops and tow trucks for the four or five people who had hit the same patch of ice and landed in the ditch. Made it home without any further complications.

-Lost a friend. Former Roommate, who sold me the car, insinuated that anything that needed to be fixed was MY FAULT. I'd had the car for all of what, three weeks? A month? Not even I can do that grand of damage to a vehicle. I said some words, he accused me of cheating on my boyfriend, and then started to spread rumors about me sleeping around. What do you expect from someone with a high school mentality? He also made a bet that he could break me and the Redhead up in the month before he moved out of our sleepy lil burg. We laughed in his face and got closer. Way to prove me right about your two-faced nature, Caleb.

-Made a new enemy. When I discover that a... young person of the female variety (because I damn sure won't call her a woman. Whore, maybe) is feeding her 18-month-old daughter Benedryl every night to make her go to sleep, in addition to whoring around while her husband is in Iraq, I am displeased. That's too weak a word; I am RAGING. He deploys, and three weeks later she fucks somebody else in a state on the other side of the COUNTRY. Which she drove his Jeep to get to. She gets pregnant, other guy abandons her, and now she's back in Warrensburg, spreading her legs for any guy that will have her. I cannot abide infidelity, so I sent an email to her husband. And her husband has a heart of gold and wants to believe she can change, and refuses to listen unless I can provide him with solid proof. What, friends that she was staying with witnessing her making out with two different dudes on the couch aren't solid enough? The next morning my car was covered in eggs. I also had a voicemail threatening to sue me for harassment if I didn't quit lying to her husband. Huh. Chris, am I harassing you? No? Thought so.

Let's see, what else... Oh yeah.

I rekindled my love for cooking. Redhead is very happy with this and seems to actually be putting on a few pounds. Not a lot, because he's a scrawny little thing, but a few pounds. For Valentine's Day he bought me stainless steel cookware, which made me squee all over my kitchen, and I've been scouring books and the Intarwebz for new recipes to try. LabRat has a new recipe she did for her Cooking Noob series that looks delicious and I am eager to try out. Bacon-wrapped shrimp? Shit yes!

I have also been watching Hell's Kitchen religiously. I loves me some Gordon Ramsay. For my birthday (which is officially 18 days away, hint hint!) I want to get some of his books, two of which have recipes and one of which is his autobiography. If you order from his website here, all books are signed. I hope to either be given or buy myself the books called Humble Pie (autobiography), Gordon Ramsay's Sunday Lunch (With DVD), and Gordon Ramsay Makes It Easy (with DVD). The man is a cooking genius and I want to mimic some of his meals.

I'm also considering culinary school. And while a lot of people tell me it's easier to just get a job as a cook somewhere and start there, I have been having some difficulty with that. I have tried again and again to get a job cooking at one of the local restaurants, but nobody will hire me because... you guessed it... I have never been employed as a cook. This creates a dilemma, no? Besides... I want to LEARN. If I get a degree in Culinary Management, I can learn the cuisine side of the business as well as how to adequately run a kitchen plus staff. Sounds like a plan to me.

And on the baby front, we have....


I think that's all I have for now. I really am sorry for such a lengthy absence, but every time I sat down to blog, I just... didn't have it in me. Sorry, ya'll. Can you ever forgive me?

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